Loading ...Berkeley’s always interested in what the government does, especially when it involves bombs 
or gay people. When it involves both bombs AND gay people, then you’ve got yourself a fabulous cocktail to enjoy.
We can’t really put this story into any better words. This is seriously in the news:
bq. A Berkeley watchdog organization that tracks military spending said it uncovered a strange U.S. military proposal to create a hormone bomb that could purportedly turn enemy soldiers into homosexuals and make them more interested in sex than fighting.
bq. Pentagon officials on Friday confirmed to CBS station KPIX-TV in San Francisco that military leaders had considered, and then subsequently rejected, building the so-called gay bomb.
The proposal included unleashing very strong amounts of aphrodisiacs so that enemy “soldiers (become) irresistibly attractive to one another.”
Because, you know, the urge to bone another man would be so consuming that you would have to drop trou in the middle of battle and get it on. We mean, this happens any time you put lots of gay men in one room. It’s a battle, all right–a battle for love.
Now, exactly how does one make a gay bomb? Nerve has the exact recipe:
bq. Warning: When building a gay bomb, never direct the gay bomb at your own genitalia. If this happens, immediately call a doctor and/or Richard Simmons.
bq. Ingredients: 3 tons uranium, regular alkaline battery, orange zest.
bq. *Step 1.* Take off your shirt. Ahhh. That’s better.
bq. *Step 2.* Rub alkaline battery, concentrating on its sensitive tip, until it emits sparks. This may take two minutes, or two hours, depending on how much you drank.
bq. *Step 3.* Dice uranium into half-inch cubes and sprinkle with orange zest. Coat with olive oil. Toss salad.
bq. *Step 3.* Bake in oven at 450 degrees while you enjoy Bravo’s reality programming.
bq. *Step 4.* Congratulations, you now have a gay bomb. Prepare to have your mind—and possibly other things—BLOWN.
Apparently, it involves having two Step 3’s. We’re pretty sure you’re supposed to serve this bomb a flambe. That means flaming.
Pentagon Confirms It Sought To Build A ‘Gay Bomb’ [KUTV]
How To Build a Gay Bomb [Nerve]
Comments:
Jun 21, 2007 at 11:57 am
Those big bad beasties. What will they think of next? I say bomb the entire world with Gay Bombs. If the effects are not long lasting then bomb it repeatedly. Like, every day. This way it puts an end to ALL WAR, people are a LOT more happy and at the same time (if it REALLY makes men attracted to just men) it’s take care of the world’s future population expolsion.