We were all little more than wide-eyed innocents during the 2000 presidential election, but we can all remember the vote counting fiasco. So we’ve been looking ever since for better ways of counting votes and it looks like one UCB statistics professor actually found one: Philip Stark developed a technique that helps audit elections, and the state assembly might actually use it.

To be honest, we got a little bogged down in the statistical details. We at the Clog, shocking as it may seem, are not statisticians. So suffice it to say that Stark’s method involves putting all the ballots from all the precincts together and read more »


Unfortunately, this is entirely real. Apparently three swastikas “were drawn on the hallway walls” of Clark Kerr “over the past few days.” Fellow residents of the units recently received an email from the chancellor strongly condemning this act. They have no idea yet who did it, what it was directed at, or if the people who did it were students or Clark Kerr residents.

But rest assured, the UC police department is on the case, and these swastikas are being classified as “hate incidents.” Because as the email said, “We cannot lose sight of the fact that the swastika remains a powerful and disturbing reminder of a Nazi regime and philosophy that condoned anti-Semitism, racism, homophobia, rabid intolerance and mass murder.”

Frankly, we were kinda hoping that as a society we were past all of the swastika-drawing hate crimes. Let’s hope that this is an isolated incident that will be resolved quickly.

Image source: tipoyock under Creative Commons
Multiple swastikas found drawn at Clark Kerr campus [Daily Cal]

Armed with fluency in Italian and an oddball passion for “sovereign immunity law,” Berkeleyite Jeffrey Lena has fast become the Vatican’s legal poster boy. Lena will soon defend Benedict XVI’s honor before the Supreme Court as the Holy See continues to be slammed by law suits: sex, copyright and Nazi sympathizer scandals aplenty.

While the exact location of his Berkeley firm remains under wraps, keep your eyes peeled for a man in a funny hat saying Hail Marys in the Gourmet Ghetto. Ten bucks says he’s got his Prius pimped out with a Sistine Chapel mural.

Image Source: RTSS under Creative Commons
Jeffery S. Lena: Lawyer at center of Vatican storm [Berkeleyside]


After discovering the latest omen of the world’s coming demise, the Clog encourages Berkeley students to put down their books and enjoy their short-lived time on Earth.

Now the Clog’s heard a lot of things in our day, but cleavage-induced earthquakes? That’s one for the books.

Spring break and Mardi Gras might be long gone, so instead, women are showing off the goods in the name of science. In response to Muslim cleric Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi, who claims that immodestly dressed women cause earthquakes, the Blag Hag blog has decided to test the theory. Blag Hag invites women everywhere to don their most revealing tops and flaunt what they got in the hopes that “the power of our scandalous bodies combined … (will) produce an earthquake.”

Ladies, boast your B cups and display your double D’s—it’s not skanky if it’s for a good cause, and this one might, quite literally, rock your world.

Image Source: fabiogis50 AWAY under Creative Commons
In the Name of Science, I Offer My Boobs [Blag Hag]
Boobquake [Facebook]
Earlier: ‘Messiah’ Says He Isn’t the Messiah


Summer, it’s about time. This post comes slightly early this year, and not a moment too soon. Because a) finals blow. We know you appreciate our turning your thoughts toward the blissful aftermath. And b) ’cause this summer is seriously front-loaded concertwise and we don’t want tickets to sell out on you.

Prepare yourself: read more »

Zomg, LOVE!

Sunday Shout-Out picks out the week’s stories that simply slipped our minds.

These five professors are quite the dapper fellows–the 2010 Guggenheim fellows, that is. Ah yes, looks like the newly-minted AAAS members weren’t the only Berkeley profs kicking AAAS-s and taking academic names. SHING! (That’s the sound of an awesome joke being made.) [NewsCenter]

Nobody wins … again. [Daily Cal]

People’s Park celebrated its 41st birthday today. People FTW! Parks FTW! Birthdays FTW! [Facebook]

They’re number one! They’re number one (round NFL Draft picks)! [Daily Cal]

Image Source: Connie Chen, Daily Cal [Through the Looking Glass]
Earlier: Not About the Super Bowl

Looks like ASUC Attorney General Kevin Gibson finally found it in himself to bring much bureaucracy and paperwork down upon Noah Stern. The AG submitted three different charge sheets to the Judicial Council which include allegations of campaigning in the dorms, voter fraud and (horror of horrors!) spamming students during election season.

The J-Council will decide tonight whether to accept the charges—and if they are accepted, odds are they will reconvene later to decide what will happen to Noah.

UPDATE: The Judicial Council has accepted all three of the sheets. Thanks, GoBears!

Image Source: Brymo under Creative Commons
Election Violation Charges Filed Against ASUC President-Elect Noah Stern [Daily Cal]

Guys, we need to talk. It’s been real and all, but the winds of change are a-stirrin’, and we’re thinking it’s time we move on to greener pastures—ones filled with giraffes, where we can throw our bodies around willy-nilly in the name of balance and divinity.

Wait … wait! You really feel that way? *Sigh* OK, maybe we’ll stick around. But if you’d been in Hertz Hall last night for “Spirit of Africa: Sacred Music and Dances,” you’d totally get where we’re coming from.

Directed by CK Ladzekpo, the concert incorporated read more »

ok, different Academy … but you get the idea.

Unfamiliar with that particular acronym? O ye of little culture. ‘Tis none other than the American Academy of Arts and Sciences, to which exactly nine Berkeley professors were recently elected. Yeeeeahh boy.

Nearly as old as the nation we call home, the Academy’s official mish is to “cultivate every art and science which may tend to advance the interest, honour, dignity, and happiness of a free, independent, and virtuous people.” Kinda broad, but we dig it. And of the 4,000 American Fellows and 600 Foreign Honorary Members comprising the AAAS, 234 can currently be found at UC Berkeley.

The most recent nine inductees (of a total 229 that were announced this past Monday) are as follows: read more »


So we were on our way to Yoga to the People the other night, and … what? Yeah we do yoga. The Clog’s gotta stay limber, yo. Anyway, we were on our way to breathe our troubles away in Warrior III, when we stumbled upon this troubling sign. “Free. Free Personality Analysis.” With an arrow pointing straight into the “Church of Scientology Berkeley Mission.”

Any L. Ron Hubbard fanboys out there care to enlighten us? If not, we’ll be forced to attend a “Hubbard Dianetics Seminar” out of sheer, unabashed curiosity. That’s a threat.

Image Source: Kate Mitchell
Earlier: Magical Transfer Station to Narnia

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