As we sit helplessly on our last day of freedom, dreading the inevitable tolling of the early-

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morning Campanile that will signal the start of the new semester, most of us can’t help but to anticipate what our new classes will be like. Will they be difficult or could the professor be a pushover? Could there be something about that 8 a.m. Physics lecture that you actually like? And the overarching question of them all — could they possibly be fun? Well in case the professor doesn’t have plans for that, we at the Clog have put together a game that might make your first few school days a little brighter.

We would make it a real drinking game, but it’d be a bit unwise to take shots in class — not to mention in the wee hours of the morning. So for the time being just use the bingo card we’ve conveniently provided for you and remember to take your card when you go out to that party tonight, one shot for each mark. The letters denote each type of student, so mark that space when you see someone who qualifies!

Type #1: The Distracted Ones (D)

These are your typical Facebook or Youtube users. Since they’re fairly common — most of us are probably guilty of checking at least once per class if we have our laptops out — we’re not going to give them that many spots on the card. They will do almost anything to escape the incessant drone of the professor’s voice.

Type #2: The Hangover (H)

The title speaks for itself. Anyone whose face suggests that they’d rather be in the sanctuary of their beds would fit the category. Watch out for those who grimace every time the professor raises his or her voice, or those who take a suspiciously long time to answer a question. This group can extend to those who are simply sleep-deprived, such as those with red eyes or those nodding off every couple of minutes.

Type #3: The Super Student (S)

Some students do one class’ homework while sitting in another class so that they’re always one step behind, enveloping themselves in a never-ending loop of assignments. These can be tricky to spot since they could appear to be taking notes, but they’ll actually be hammering away furiously at their current endeavor anxiously trying to finish it before it’s due. Through the first week of class, you can probably catch the occasional student on ScheduleBuilder or NinjaCourses since no one really knows their class schedule just yet.

Type #4: The Obnoxious One (O)

This is a little open ended. It can range from yawning loudly, to listening to music at an obscenely high volume, and in rare cases even Skyping with one’s significant other during lecture. Yes, there indeed a few who fit the last group, so give yourself a pat on the back if you can find those. Oh, and if you do spot those, kindly tell them to turn their tunes down so the rest of us don’t get chemistry confused with The Chemical Brothers.

Type #5: The Know-It-All (K)

We’ve all seen one of these in some class. They’ll correct the professor when the latter is talking about their winter vacation, or they will be quick to point out how the lecture slides are wrong in some way. They typically try to answer all the questions to impress everyone with their omniscience, but it usually backfires and ends up alienating them from the rest of the students. And if they give you a dirty look when you label them as such, feel free to return the favor.

Unfortunately, you can’t give yourself a point if you fit any of these categories, but go ahead and give yourself the middle space for free for just being in class on the first week. Here’s one last bonus — if the professor somehow fits any of these categories, you can check off two spaces. Enjoy class — and that hangover you’ll have tomorrow — everyone!



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