Image Source: Anna Hiatt, Daily Cal

… but what about the rest of the world watching via the Internet? Here are some highlights:

Wednesday, Nov. 18

6:51 p.m.

“As hundreds of students rushed the building today where UC Regents were meeting – throwing wet red bandannas meant to look like blood – the regents’ finance committee voted to recommend a 32 percent student fee increase, setting off planned protests at several UC campuses.” [SFGate]

“The two-day meeting is being held at UCLA, where today’s session has been marked by raucous protests with at least 14 arrests. … A presentation on the budget and fee increase proposal by UC President Mark Yudof was interrupted. Police cleared the public from the hall but a group of protesters refused to leave, standing and singing ‘We Shall Overcome.’” [LA Times]

“‘We seem to be fighting each other rather than working together,’ said Regent Sherry Lansing, a former Paramount Pictures CEO, after several student outbursts had delayed the meeting. ‘This choice is not our choice. This is something that has been put on us by the Legislature and the federal government.’” [MercuryNews]

“Hundreds of students, staff and faculty massed on Sproul Plaza Wednesday for a rally denouncing student fee hikes, program cuts, layoffs and other cutbacks across the UC system. The rally, smaller than a similar protest in September, was part of a three-day strike that resulted in some class cancellations or relocations and scattered office closures.” [NewsCenter]

“English professor Bob Hass, a former U.S. poet laureate, called for higher taxes so that more money can be spent on education. Hass said California spent more money per student on education than all but one or two states before Proposition 13, which limits property tax increases, was passed in 1978. California now ranks nearly last on spending per student, he said.” [CBS5]

“I think it’s necessary to have a large number of students down there to show that it’s not just the unions, it’s the students being affected. In about eight years my daughter will be applying to school so I have to do this, you know?” [NYTimes] via Bay Area Blogs

And where oh where is Bearcardo?

“I see students really, really, really stressed out,” said Ricardo Gomez of the group Berkeley Students Against Cuts. “Not knowing whether or not they’re going to be here next semester.” [FoxReno]

Thursday, Nov. 19

10:07 a.m.

“About 30 students stormed UCLA’s Campbell Hall and barricaded the doors with chains and bike locks early this morning to protest a student fee increase that is expected to be endorsed by the University of California’s Board of Regents today.” [LA Times]

12:40 p.m.

“Dozens of students lined up early for seats inside the regents meeting, hoping for a chance at the microphone during the public comment time before today’s vote. Campus police with riot gear lined up between the loud but peaceful protesters and the entrance.” [CNN]

“Upon hearing the news about the vote to hike fees, an estimated 500 students at UCSC — some in costumes and face paint, some carrying picket signs — marched to the base of campus at Bay Drive and High Street and the west entrance on Empire Grade. They stood or sat in the middle of the road, blocking vehicles trying to enter UCSC. Police diverted traffic at several points leading to campus.” [Santa Cruz Sentinel]

2:11 p.m.

“Crossed the picket lines. In order to get my fucking education.” [Twitter]

4:06 p.m.

“Outside the meeting at UCLA where regents of the University of California raised student tuition today by 32 percent, about 1,000 students lay on the ground to symbolize what they called the death of affordable higher education, particularly for students from low-income families.” [SFGate]

“Only one member of the board, student regent Jesse Bernal, voted against the plan that UC officials said was necessary due to a recent plunge in financial aid from the state. The Los Angeles Times said the vote came with little discussion among the members and amid loud protests that could be heard in the campus meeting room.” [UPI.com]

“Some University of California regents who approved a student fee increase are trapped inside a UCLA building as protesters block the exits. The demonstrators are being confronted Thursday by lines of baton-wielding campus police, California Highway Patrol officers and metal barriers. … One person inside the building says the regents have been held there for two hours. [AP] via Google

4:29 p.m.

“UC President escorted out w police w tazers and rubber guns as students chant Shame on you.” [Twitter]

4:42 p.m.

6:43 p.m.

” … UC students should explore other means available to pay for their education: They can always go to community college like the rest of us. Screw those spoiled brat UCLA students. Hit up your rich mommies and daddies for the difference. Cry me a river. What a bunch of useless losers.” [LA Times]

Friday, Nov. 20

12:30 a.m.

“Police arrested 52 people at UC Davis after hundreds protested a 32 percent increase in undergraduate student fees on Thursday.” [KCRA]

9:04 a.m.

“UC Berkeley students took over a campus building in protest this morning, a day after the University of California regents voted to raise tuition by 32 percent. An undetermined number of protesters barricaded themselves at about 6 a.m. inside Wheeler Hall, which houses the English department.” [SF Gate]

“The campus police are working to resolve a protest action that is occurring in Wheeler Hall.  Staff, faculty and students who would normally be working in Wheeler Hall  are asked to remain out of the building until further notice.  Employees who can contact their supervisors should talk to them if possible to determine whether telecommuting or relocation to another work area is an option.  Those in the building right now are advised to leave until the situation has been resolved.
Employees who remain on campus may check in at Dwinelle Plaza at 10am. for further information.
Thank you to all of the members of the campus community for your patience in this matter.” -UC Berkeley Chancellor Robert Birgeneau via e-mail

10:49 a.m.

Campus police continue to work to resolve the protest action at Wheeler Hall.  Campus police are striving to end the occupation of Wheeler Hall with the safety of our campus community, including all those involved in this action, as an uppermost priority.
Wheeler Hall will remain closed until further notice.  Instructors who teach in Wheeler Hall will be contacted shortly by e-mail.” -Bobby B., again, via e-mail

12:41 P.M.

From the Daily Cal and the Daily Clog’s Twitter accounts:

“UC officers taser at least two student protesters at UCLA http://bit.ly/5CYv8u”
“Photo of police barricade in front of Wheeler Hall #ucstrike #ucregents http://www.dailycal.org/image.php?id=15855″
“One of our field reporters says that the crowd in front of Wheeler Hall is talking about storming the building. #ucstrike #ucregents”
“Fire alarms at Dwinelle, Barrows, MLK, Moffitt and VLSB have gone off in the last hour; hundreds of students evacuated. #ucstrike #ucregents”
“According to one of the organizers, Breslauer has agreed to begin negotiations with them.”

11:56 p.m.

Due to a massive amount of traffic, the Clog was temporarily down for much of the day. To read our coverage of Friday’s occupation of Wheeler, go to twitter.com/thedailyclog

Expect continual updates throughout the course of the strike.

Image Source (lower): Valerie Woolard
32% Inflation in UCLA Tuition Causes Near Riots (14 Arrested, 1 Tasered) [YouTube]

There is, according to one Berkeley economist, a five percent chance that the U.S. will experience a “depression-causing shock.” We’d be interested to see the breakdown in his math. [Seattle Times]

Want to know the alleged (and disturbing) connection between flu shots, mercury and autism? Enlighten yourself at a Nov. 21 symposium at the UC Berkeley Art Museum Theater. Oh, except it’s 60 bucks. So maybe just Google Dr. Andy Wakefield. [PRLog]

And, in conclusion, a pithy affirmation of all your chronic concerns. [http://iscaliforniaonfire.com]

Didn’t know this coming week’s been designated Sh*t Goes Down: The Remix? Well, to begin with, we recommend removing your heads from your … um, readers. There’s a bright, sunny world out there, people! Filled with walkouts and pickets and rallies galore.

A guide to “No Business As Usual” in a nutshell:

Wednesday, Thursday and Friday (Nov. 18-20): University Professional and Technical Employees (UPTE) begin picketing every morning at 5 a.m.

Nov. 18: Mass rally starting at noon on Sproul; march followed by a “Strike Meeting: What’s Next?”

Nov. 19: Another noon rally, this time meeting at California Hall; 4 p.m. Strike Meeting on Sproul.

Nov. 20: Noon rally at California Hall once again. This time, “if the Regents increase our fees, lay us off and cut our pay, we will have no choice but to escalate our actions.” Anarchy? Nay—slumber party! “Tent City throughout the strike in solidarity with UCLA. Bring a pilow !”

… Right. Expect updates in days to come.

Image Source: Diana Newby
Strike @ UC Berkeley: No Business As Usual [IndyBay]
Earlier: More Yogurt, More Land

We’re assuming most of you have already figured this one out, but for those of you who are a little slower adding two and two, we (and Mark Baldassare) are here to inform you that cutting funds in the UC system is not exactly the best means of redress. To prolong our prior metaphor, it is, in fact, exactly like chucking all the life-vests overboard. Or throwing out the baby with the bathwater. Substitute idiom of preference here.

Let’s break it down: College costs more. –> Fewer people attend college. –> Fewer people graduate college. –> California becomes stupid.

Or, in slightly more articulate terms, “the state will face a severe shortage of college graduates needed for important jobs unless there’s a concerted effort to better fund higher education and encourage young people to attend and graduate from college.”

As Baldassare—president and chief executive of the Public Policy Institute of California—put it when addressing the UC Commission on the Future: “The supply of college graduates is not likely to keep up with the demand.”

Meaning we’ve basically trapped ourselves in an ever-spiraling vortex of economic doom. And while all of this strikes us as inherently obvious, maybe the Commission isn’t as forward-thinking as its name seems to imply. Maybe Baldassare’s damning vision will instill the bone-deep terror necessary to make informed decisions when shaping the UC destiny—and, by the same token, the fate of California as a whole.

Or maybe we really are better off abandoning ship and bouncing to kangaroo country.

Image Source: hint of plum under Creative Commons
Expert predicts shortage of college grads in California [SFExaminer]

Our title represents the Clog’s interpretation, more or less, of the message being sent by the $10.9 million grant to research the effects of sanitation on diarrheal disease. No, not the kind potentially lurking in your keyboard (although we find that just as alarming in its own special little way).

Rather, the 5-year grant from the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation is intended toward the evaluation of methods currently used to improve health—especially that of children—in developing countries. The World Health Organization estimates that “2.2 million children under the age of 5 die from diarrheal diseases each year”—a phenomenon rooted in pervasive issues such as poor water quality, hygiene and sanitation.

Unfortunately, there’s more to addressing the problem than distributing bottles of Purell. The task that has fallen to Dr. Jack Colford of UC Berkeley’s School of Public Health (in collaboration with a couple other NGOs) is that of determining, in a nutshell, which existing interventions are most effective.

Focusing specifically on Bangladesh and Kenya, the study will target an anticipated 23,000 children in trials investigating “how sanitation interventions, delivered alone or as part of combined intervention packages, impact child health and well-being,” the results of which may determine the future allocation of funds in health and economic sectors worldwide.

Obviously, we expect to see some of those moneys trickle down into a campaign to de-poop computer labs.

Image Source: hll!H under Creative Commons
Gates Foundation awards $10.9 million to study impacts of sanitation on diseases [News Center]

It’s Christmas come early at the Clog, boys and girls. Considering how long it’s been (read: over five months) since we last cleaned out our comment closet, we’ve got a veritable Santa’s bag of goodies this time around.

Where O where to begin? Perhaps an appetizer featuring unexpected “your mom” jokes? Or maybe you prefer to whet your taste with a tall glass of ummm-fair-enough?

OK, sorry, the allegory was starting to creep us out, too. Speaking of creepy, we found this baby on a Nov. 2008 post on “How To: Meet Clint Eastwood“:

I would like to meet Clint Eastwood because he is my father and I have never met my father. So how do you meet some that is famous and tell Them Hi I am your son. I don’t expect to meet him in this life as he is getting on in years and so am I fore that matter. I have been trying for the last ten years with no luck.

Not much we can say about that one.

Moving on to slightly less unsettling territory—in response to our mention of rat droppings in their facilities, a commenter bearing the moniker “SmartAlecs” offered the rejoinder, “Maybe if you didnt dine and dash we could afford new mouse traps!” Which had us all riled up with righteous indignation (how could you people rip off the creators of such delicious soup?!) … until we remembered that at Smart Alec’s, you pay before you get your food.

And then we were just confused.

Which is apparently a recurrent trend, considering our bemusement when confronted with the comments by “Cassie Myers” on a post by … Cassie Myers. With the first one beginning “C’mon Cassie,” no less. Schizophrenia, mayhap? Or the case of the wily doppelganger?? It took some intensive sleuthing, but we Nancy Drew’d the sh•t out of you, Cassie Myers … who isn’t really Cassie Myers (spoiler!).

And now, having saved the best for last: one of our most esteemed followers—hint: his name rhymes with Bearcardo … oh, did that totally give it away?—has (somewhat unsurprisingly) accrued a fervent (and ironically anonymous) following of his own. Reproductive overtures are great and all, but we think this quote most effectively sums up the prevailing sentiment:

What you do not know about Ricardo Gomez is that he has the strength of one thousand stallions, the heart of one thousand warriors, and the stamina of one thousand prickly pears. The prophets say he will also liberate England from one thousand Queens.

Cheers.

Earlier: Gob Bluth and Pun-ions and Pixies, Oh My!

What if we told you that the university is currently advertising two on-campus homes for sale at the fabulously low price of exactly one buckaroo? Being the remarkably astute and endearingly cynical college students we know you are, you’d probably immediately speculate on the inevitable fine print of such an outlandish offer.

Congratulations! Higher education has served you well. The duo of houses, located at 2241 and 2243 College Ave, can be generously described as real fixer-uppers, and (arguably) more accurately characterized as pieces of sh*t.

So, whatever, you cough up $1 for a 100-year-old building that we imagine counts asbestos among the very least of its concerns. But wait! That’s not all. Now that you’ve got this behemoth of a beauty on your hands, the UC wants you to move it—pronto.

Where to, you wonder? Hey, that’s not their problem. The school’s sole objective, according to a laconic Craiglist ad, is “conveying one or both of the buildings to an interested buyer for one dollar in exchange for the buyer moving the structures from the site in a timely manner.”

Which sounds, in a nutshell, like Berkeley is recruiting suckers conscientious preservationists to take out their trash. Without, might we add, disturbing a handful of “beautiful mature trees.” Oh, and you have to make a $100,000 deposit—so, you know, they don’t think you’re full of crap.

We suggest saving your money for the bus.

Image Source: Thomas Hawk under Creative Commons
Two Berkeley homes for sale: just $1.00 each [SFGate]

Beetles, that is—cyborg beetles, sponsored by the Pentagon.

We hope our nonverbal attempt at a dramatic pause allowed you sufficient time to recover. Because if you’re wondering when good ol’ tree-sitting, Yoo-hating, cupcake-driving Berkeley went all futuristic spy thriller on our hinies … well, you’re definitely not alone. Moreover, if you’re reeling in the throes of paralyzing awe at how flippin’ sweet a cyborb beetle would be, once again, we are right there with you.

To be sure, the groundbreaking project—headed by Michel Maharbiz and Hirotaka Sato—is just as cool as it sounds. Implanted with electrodes in early stages of growth, and then outfitted with a microbattery and microcontroller, the beetles in question are flown by remote control through a “radio-equipped miniature neural stimulating system.” We can only imagine PETA would be thrilled to pieces.

The possibilities engendered by such an invention are vast—and to some, of course, a little unnerving, especially given the rather obvious implication of the cyborg beetles’ future role in a military function. Noel Sharkey of Sheffield University, hypothesizing about their varied abilities, mentions the little critters’ potential for “carrying any kind of chemical or biological weapons, so you could do personal assassinations”—which is, he prefaces, “totally illegal,” by the way.

If by “illegal” he means “plausible,” then yeah, sounds about right. And now we’re off to fantasize about the fun we would have with a Borg bug to call our own …

Remote-controlled cyborg beetle [YouTube]
Remote controlled bugs buzz off [BBC News]

It’s an unfortunate reality that renders last week’s opening of a Books Inc. location in Berkeley (not far, in fact, from Cody’s Books’ previous turf) all the more auspicious. Indeed, the independent chain, which now has 10 stores scattered throughout the Bay and one in southern California, serves as something of a beacon of hope for any and all bookworms who have ever waxed nostalgic on literary days of yore.

In accounting for Books Inc.’s successful tenacity, Hut Landon, the Northern California Independent Booksellers Association’s executive director, explains:

“Books Inc. is an absolutely quintessential model for what makes a successful independent bookstore in this day and age. It has to do with store size and location. In virtually every case, the stores are under 5,000 square feet and almost always in a vibrant shopping area. Smaller neighborhood bookstores that don’t try to be everything to everybody can control expenses and overhead and provide fabulous service and knowledgeable booksellers.”

Feel that? It’s the itch of fingers jonesing to rifle through inky pages … the twitch of a nose longing to drink the sweet, sultry smell of happiness bound by glue. Eh, what’s that, Stevens? Something about “fetishization of language?” Oh, what can we say–guilty as charged. You’ll find us at 1760 Fourth Street, overindulging.

We all know how it goes: If you live in Berkeley, and you’re not politically involved, people will most likely think you’re a tool. Which is not to say that the parameters of “politically involved” are particularly stringent. All you really need is a sign and a red ribbon and hey, look at that! You’re an activist.

So naturally it would follow that the best means of demonstrating your commitment to environmental ethics is to befriend a gorilla. No, we don’t mean getting down and dirty Jane Goodall-style. These are modern times, kiddlins–all you need is the Internet.

Didn’t know Ugandan mountain gorillas are a critically endangered species? Well, consider yourself informed; and just how are you going to alleviate that cumbersome burden from your world-weary shoulders? Why, by following those gorillas on Twitter, of course! Lord knows, with only 720 left alive, they need all the social networking they can get.

Go on, then: fill up your friend cart with a silverback or two, and sleep easy knowing that, for now, you’ve made the world a better place. With any luck, there’s a “Friend a Child Soldier” project in the making. Hey, displaced people deserve Facebook friends, too.

Image Source: 9brandon under Creative Commons
Friend a Gorilla [site]
Earlier: Convince Yourself You’re Planning Ahead