In the (approximate) words of President Barack Obama, “Yes it can!” Finally, the ASUC has come up with a bill that would both be actually worth considering and might pass without a shit-ton of useless squabbling. (Cross your fingers … )

Now. You may be wondering to yourself, “What, pray tell, could this magical bill be, that will be cool and awesome and will save the student body thousands of needlessly spent dollars?” The answer, friends, is a bill being drafted by Elections Council Chair Vinit Sukhija that would greatly reduce physical polling stations for the ASUC’s mightily expensive elections. Instead, students would vote –wait for it, wait for it –online.

Last year, only about 10 percent of the votes were cast in person at one of the 13 real, $3,000-a-pop polling stations. Call us crazy technology-worshipping radicals, but might we suggest getting rid of physical polling stations altogether? The strongest anticipated argument against the bill thus far is that voter turnout will suffer from decreased publicity.

But the whole process is already so inbred, and the general non-sign-wielding population cares so little about the elections that we sincerely doubt the mere sight of those polling stations really drummed up that much voter turnout. They’re pretty much just tables with laptops on them, anyway.

And as long-contested Finance Officer Alan Ni once said, “Having more money is always good … ” We couldn’t agree more.

Image Source: Caveman 92223 under Creative Commons
ASUC Considers Polling Station Reductions [Daily Cal]

The “STUDENT TOWN HALL” will also feature Executive Vice Chancellor George Breslauer and Dean of Students Jonathan Poullard, not to mention “key student representatives,” who we’re sure are not in any way affiliated with the ASUC and are not in any way named “Will Smelko.”

We’re also sure that this “conversation” will be a very orderly and un-shit show-like event, where students and administrators, together, will make fair, rational arguments and everyone’s voice will be heard. No one will yell or be irrelevant and/or self-righteous and when Birgy opens his mouth, sunshine will spontaneously spill forth into the world. Solutions will be discovered and good times will be had by all.

OK, OK–our cynicism got a little out of hand, there. We guess any attempt at transparency is a worthwhile attempt at transparency. Right? So good on you, ASUC and Chancellor Birgeneau. We’re looking forward to seeing how things go down this Thursday from 7:30-9:30 p.m. in Pauley Ballroom.

Image Source: Lara Brucker, Daily Cal

He’s coming to promote his first nonfiction work, Eating Animals, a book about why people shouldn’t eat animals. It really seems to be a theme in Berkeley this year. Seriously, when’s Ingrid Newkirk gonna come and speak?

The book has already won the favor of Oprah and converted Natalie Portman to veganism. Portman explains how Foer takes a stab at Pollan:

He posits that consideration, as promoted by Michael Pollan in The Ominvore’s Dilemma, which has more to do with being polite to your tablemates than to your own ideals, would be absurd if applied to any other belief (e.g., I don’t believe in rape, but if it’s what it takes to please my dinner hosts, then so be it).

Just goes to show: even when you’re preaching to the choir, they’ll still criticize your sermon.

Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer [YouTube]
Acclaimed novelist Jonathan Safran Foer book signing at the Multicultural Center on November 6 [ASUC]
Natalie Portman: Jonathan Safran Foer’s Eating Animals Turned Me Vegan [HuffingtonPost]

The ASUC Senate finally got around to choosing a finance officer last week, junior Alan Ni. Apparently there was some concern that his previous interest in poker would conflict with his duties as finance officer. Still, was there really that much to deliberate about for the past three weeks? [Daily Cal]

Harvard was recently ranked number one on a list for  something besides best American universities … that’s right, the most Twitter followers. We can’t say we’re upset we didn’t make the list. [The Paper Trail]

Earlier: At Least We Can Still Eat Breakfast

Well this is comforting. It’s so nice to hear that whatever challenges the world throws this university’s way, the ASUC will still manage to render many of the things they do invalid by “forgetting” to appoint people on time and otherwise quibbling about stuff no one cares about. It’s almost as if literally nothing has changed over the past year. How delightful.

Maybe next semester they’ll also spend another $20,000 to recall (except not really) another senator named Shmohn Shmoghtashmer. It’ll be good times. They’re certainly off to a great start with this year’s Attorney General Kevin Gibson doing his best Michael Sinanian:

“I will be filing suit Thursday on behalf of the students of the University of California, Berkeley, and I assure you I will win,” he told the senate earlier this week. He’s got a ways to go before he’s throwin’ around the ol’ “torrent of shame and disgrace,” but there’s still time. Oh, there’s time.

ok go treadmill [YouTube]
ASUC Attorney General Says Senate Cannot Conduct Official Business [Daily Cal]

Do you find yourself perplexed as to what to do this Friday? Perhaps the ideas of going to class, seeing a movie or taking a well-deserved nap are just not enough. You want something more involved, preferably involving ASUC officials and free food.

Well, you’re in luck, because the ASUC is hosting a rollicking barbecue from noon to 2 p.m. on Lower Sproul Plaza this Friday with just that. There will be a concert, free food and (the best part) your elected officials. Maybe you’re looking to network and get a position in the ASUC, maybe you lost the contest (or whatever that was) for a date with Dani Haber and you’re hoping to try plan B or maybe you’re just a cheapskate who wants free food.

Image Source: DeusXFlorida under Creative Commons
ASUC BBQ [Facebook]

“But wait,” you probably cried out in distress. “The Clog told me that Tully’s opened weeks ago. Why would they lie like that?”

Fear not, fair reader, as there is a reasonable explaination for all of this. Tully’s has indeed been open for weeks, but Monday is the grand opening. Which is by definition grander than the previous one. For example, they’re giving out free stuff, and knowing as we do how much college students love free stuff, we thought we should let you know.

The first 300 visitors get free coffee mugs, and at the bottom of the e-mail there’s a coupon for a free cup of coffee. There’s also going to be a band and general fanfare. In addition, the coffee location is now being officially christened with its new ridiculous Oski name, which we’ve already forgotten.

We hear that this Tully’s also provides free same-day refills of coffee with valid student ID. So … happy coffee drinking.

Image Source: Valerie Woolard

Luckily, thanks to your fearless ASUC, you will now have just that. A Tully’s kiosk opened just this afternoon in Martin Luther King Jr. Student Union.

The new location sells sandwiches, drinks and colored candy blocks, as well as providing limited seating and Airbears access. It will also be open weekends, although no specific hours were posted that we could find.

Image Source: Valerie Woolard
Tully’s Prepares to Open Branch in Student Union [Daily Cal]

At Calapalooza this evening, we at the Clog spotted another fun ASUC publicity ploy. This lovely poster advertised the opportunity the win a date with External Affairs Vice President Dani Haber and President Will Smelko.

A date with both of them simultaneously sounds a little awkward, but to each their own. We’re not sure what exactly is required to win the date either, perhaps it’s some sort of new fundraising ploy, in which case, maybe other campus groups will soon follow suit …

Image Source: Valerie Woolard
Earlier: First LastSundaysFest

The new school year means all sorts of changes, and probably one of the last of them on your mind was the official convening of the new ASUC senate. The first senate meeting of the semester took place last night, and while we’re assuming it’s not still going on, it wouldn’t be a record if it were.

Th ASUC also seems to be making a bit more of an effort to be hip and cool, launching a blog and a twitter feed. Now, we’re not entirely sure how reading Will Smelko’s tweets about the chancellor’s reception is supposed to usher in a grand era of hope and change in the ASUC in the face of a largely apathetic student body, but we suppose that remains to be seen.

Image Source: jonas_k under Creative Commons
ASUC Elected Officials Blog [ASUC]
ASUC President [Twitter]