Over the past couple of days local blog InBerkeley has posted not one, but TWO somewhat terrifying visuals of Berkeley succumbing to natural disaster.

First they put up a link to an interactive flood map. Did you know that when the sea rises 14 meters as a result of global warming everything west of San Pablo Avenue will be pretty much effed? Well, now you do. Then they put up a couple of (actually really interesting) newsreels showing the great Berkeley-burning fire of 1923. Despite that they are cool in a “Wow, look at these old time-y people doing old time-y things” kind of way, they still show Berkeley burning to the ground. And that’s a little scary.

Knock on wood about that huge friggin’ earthquake we’re due for.

1923 Berkeley fire films [InBerkeley]
Flood map shows Berkeley stays mostly dry as sea levels rise [InBerkeley]

Few things pose more pressing threats than rampant pot-smoking and disillusioned hippiedom. At least that seems to be the general consensus, considering Berkeley now apparently ranks as the 43rd most dangerous city in the country.

Sure, it’s a bit shady in this particular neck of the woods; but what about the conspicuous dearth of a certain dear neighbor of ours on the aforementioned list? Certainly if Berkeley even registers on the national radar for crime-heavy areas, one would think Oakland would be raising a few red flags. But no—and what’s more, Berkeley is actually considered the most dangerous city in California with a population over 25,000.

It would be redundant to point out that this really doesn’t make any sense.

Ace Ventura – When the Nature calls – Alrighty Then [YouTube]
Berkeley: crime-infested and dangerous to know? [SFGate]

Yep, the wise professors of the Professors’ Guide fairly warn you to beware of apathy–because, honestly, how likely are you to keep up with a class you’re not paying your parents’ hard-earned money to take? You’ve got about a snowball’s chance in hell of actually getting anything out of it–unless it’s a subject for which you have (brace yourself … ) genuine interest.

Or, if you’re looking for something a little less useful than a full course, you could just use your summer to catch up on all those famous guest speakers that came to campus. Audio from many of those events is posted on Berkeley’s webcast site, too.

His Holiness the XIV Dalai Lama: Peace Through Compassion [YouTube]
6 Tips for Taking College Courses Free of Charge [US News]
UC Berkeley Webcasts [Website]
Earlier: Utilize Your Seemingly Banal Talents

The switch was instated four years ago under the assumption that crop-based biodiesel would be gentler on the environment than regular petroleum. However, researchers now realize that while the exhaust itself is cleaner, the process of turning crops into fuel emits more pollution than it’s worth. Furthermore, the policy creates an incentive for farmers to replace edible crops with crops intended for biofuel, thereby limiting food supply and exacerbating world hunger.

Berkeley policy makers considered a number of alternatives, such as returning to fryer-grease biofuel, which they originally switched to six years ago with no unfortunate results. Oh, wait–two truck engines exploded. So, round and round we go.

Image Source: Simon Iddol under Creative Commons.
Berkeley says bye to biofuel [Berkeley Voice]

While many were hypothetically concerned with metaphorically sawing the allegorical tree on Wednesday, the UC Board of Regents was deciding on whether to chop the university-wide student body by 10,000 (or some other high number, probably in the thousands). Literally.

That the regents’ 8-2 vote to “send a message” to state legislators warning of the “possible” enrollment cut happens now should come as no surprise, especially given “the” current financial situation: Nobody has any money. Nobody.

But whenever a nontrivial decision has to be made, there will probably be dissenters. In this case, it comes with the affected parties in mind: poorer applicants and underrepresented minorities, according to regent Eddie Island.

What a sticky-icky situation.

Image Source: crimfants under Creative Commons
Without More Funding, UC May Cut Enrollment [Daily Cal]

While the debate over the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis—also known as the linguistic relativity hypothesis—has been raging for untold billions of seconds, Tuesday’s Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences has a report that details research on how learning a color’s name changes its perception, in a way.

Quoth the Berkeley linguist, “It appears, as far as we can tell, that somehow the brain, when it has categories such as color, it actually consults those categories.”

Specifically, before one learns—for example—that yellow is called yellow, his or her brain handles greenness on the right side of the brain, while adults think about color with the left side.

Similarly, learning what to call an animal changes perception from right to left.

So … the ancient Greeks were actually pretty childish?

Image Source: fensterbme under Creative Commons
Color perception shifts from right brain to left [Associated Press]
The Beatles “Yellow Submarine” [YouTube]

We may have much for which to be thankful this year, but in Berkeley, the familiar counter-phrase “thanks-taking” takes on a second meaning.

Early stats from the farm bureau (whatever that is) reveal that costs for your hearty, heart-attack dinner come Big Thursday are up from last year. And, despite the Berkeley “to-hell-with-’em” attitude for one politically incorrect holiday or another, Berkeley and Oakland clock in as the highest surveyed spenders nation wide at an average of $59 per family Thanksgiving meal. Dinner is served.

And of course, when everything sucks, blame it on gas prices. The bureau speculates that a rise in annual costs are only following the high tide of gas prices. To this we say, “give thanks!” for gas nowadays is practically up for grabs.

Even for you lucky ducks having Thanksgiving elsewhere this year, it doesn’t hurt to save some dough. Here are a few tips on how to cut your costs … and even preemptively trim your tummy before the holidays take full flight.

Image Source: bret pettis under Creative Commons
Thanksgiving Food Costs High In Berkeley, Oakland [cbs5]

What’s going on? South Dakota is celebrating Native American Day and Venezuela is partying it up for Day of the Indigenous Resistance, but that doesn’t help us.

Google’s ever-morphing logo is usually a good indicator of what happened today in history:

Paddington Bear?

For those of you who genuinely forgot, yesterday was Columbus Day, a federally recognized holiday. As such, that puts Columbus right up there with Martin Luther King Jr. (savior of black civil rights), Jesus Christ (savior of humanity), and Washington (savior of liberty for white men from, well, other white men).

Besides New Year’s Day, the only other federal holidays are Memorial Day, Independence Day, Labor Day and Veterans’ Day–and let’s face it, those are all really the same thing . Now, if you’re keeping score at home (or in class), throw in Thanksgiving, and our explorer friend Chris has raked in more federal holidays than, um, the Clog?

This just doesn’t fly with Berkeley (another oddity to add to the list). Our calendars were marked “Indigenous People’s Day!!!!!!zOMFG!! =)” Berkeley celebrated with a powwow and Indian market for the grown-ups and dream-catchers and Native American stories for the kids.

Across the bay, scrawled on Stanford University’s sidewalks were chalk messages crying “Happy Rape, Mutilation and Murder Day,” “Celebrating Genocide Since 1492″ and”Celebrating Murder for 615 Years”

Too bad Christoforo Columbo dropped in on North America 516 years ago, not 615.

In other news: Bush hosts Italian Prime Minister for Columbus Day dinner (or preferred headline: Italin Prime Minister Knocks Over Podium, and vows to be BFF with US). Revered guests included Mario Andretti and Frankie Valli.

In other other news: The California Band celebrates Valli over Colombo:

Image Source: Adam Pieniazek under Creative Commons
Rape, Murder, and Mutilation: Happy Columbus Day, University Style [US News and World Report]

Yep, it’s that special time of year that’s like every other special time of year—Homecoming is back! (Though we could have gone with midterm season.) Berkeley has a Homecoming you can take pride in: Unlike other campus festivities like Caltopia, you can get lots of free things during Homecoming.

And unlike Cal Day, there will be tons of lectures by Berkeley professors that will make even the most balanced jack of all trades feel inadequate. And unlike the Big Game, there will be a rally with mass, cultish chanting in an effort to magically secure a win for the upcoming football game.

To get you all in the spirit, the Clog decided to pick out a few events for which you should keep your eyes out:

Wednesday
Check out the Acacia House Fraternity Band from noon to 1 p.m. on Upper Sproul Plaza as they play only cover songs—no originals. The song lineup will include such goodies as Michael Jackson’s “Billie Jean” and Boston’s “More Than A Feeling.”

Also check out Picnic Day on Memorial Glade from 11:00 a.m. to 1 p.m. The food lineup will include such goodies as downtown Oakland and Berkeley restaurant samples. Just remember—if you’re going to play Frisbee, don’t do it on the west side of the glade. It’s treacherous.

Thursday
Dance and Casino Night promises to be entertaining at the very least. Come dressed in your fanciest shmanciest suit or dress to dance or play Blackjack. Just don’t bleed out the corner of your eye or else the chiseled British man with the incomparable wit will take $100 million from your secret bank account.

Friday
Get some free Fenton’s ice cream at the Homecoming Headquarters Student Tent from noon to 1 p.m. We admit, originally we weren’t going to post this—until we remembered we have a midterm during that exact block of time. Oh well, we had some Fenton’s on Sunday anyway.

Later in the day will be the Rally Committee’s traditional pre-rally barbecue and rally. The barbecue, as it turns out, is free and so is the rally. But rallies hardly fill up an empty stomach … unless they’re some sort of, we don’t know, food rally. Do they even have those?

Saturday
Out of respect for completeness, we’ll urge you to go to the Homecoming football game, even though you probably already are planning on it. Kickoff is at 12:30 p.m. which means you should probably get there about 5 hours early.

The “Thanks to Berkeley …” PhotoBooth will be taking even more portraits from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. We hear participants even get candy as recompense. A stranger asking young people to be photographed in a covered booth in exchange for candy? You’d be foolish not to do it!

Sunday
Richard Goode, a pianist with the necessary flair to do justice to such classical greats as Mozart, Chopin, Beethoven and Bach, will be playing at Zellerbach Hall promptly at 3 p.m. Tickets are available from Cal Performances.

Image Source: minwoo under Creative Commons
Homecoming [Site]
Student Homecoming Week [Site]

Yeah, who?

The requisite banana-mobile.

There's nothing more Berkeley than baked goods.

And, of course, naked people.

Edit: Check out the Daily Cal’s article here.

Image Source: Courtesy, Jasmine Hyatt
Berkeley Marches to Its Own Beat in Parade [Daily Cal]