Ninety thousand dollars will get you four memberships to the “University Club,” which includes 50-year rights to your seat, on-campus parking on game days, free food and drinks, and cup holders. Your family can even inherit the seat if you don’t happen to make it for the next 50 years.

Don’t worry, this isn’t some kind of fundraiser for the construction of that four-story eyesore that was the source of so much controversy, it’s for the renovation of the crumbling 86-year-old stadium sitting on the fault line behind it. The goal is to increase the school’s athletic endowment tenfold, to a half billion dollars over a 30-year period.

Apparently 40 percent of the 3,000 available seats have already been claimed, raising over $100 million. But with season tickets at just $305, we want to know what kind of people are forking over almost a quarter million dollars for the University Club. We’re reevaluating calling the tree sitters crazy.

Image Source: martinhfp under Creative Commons
$225,000 for prime Cal football tickets [SFGate]

As promised, the Clog is giving you the low-down on a preview of the kick-off for massive fund raising effort for Cal football.

Cal dreams of expanding the school’s $50 million sports endowment to a whopping $1 billion in the next 30 years. Criminy. Before you start creating your “1,000,000 strong for keeping UC fees down” Facebook groups, worry not–Cal plans to hit up the wealthiest among us as their first step to big, fat checks. And what faster way towards $1 billion than a little piece of property in the Cal stadium? We’re talking individual seats for up to $225,000 each. As usual, these monied football fans’ first-class section includes complimentary food, parking (a privelege for which most Berkeleyans would give up their first-born) and lounge access.

With the Endowment Seating Program, rather than purching annual tickets, buyers will have ownership of their seat for 30 years. If these aging (to put it mildly) folks don’t anticipate living that long, they actually have the option of “endowing” their seat to their favorite suck-up grandkid. From a more capitalist perspective, buyers will also be allowed to sell their seat, much like a piece of property or stock.

We suppose that if nothing else, these seats will be worth its market value for its protection against the California elements: 80-some degree summers, light rain and the Hayward faultline. Sorry, peons of the student section, continue to read up on Memorial Stadium evacuation procedure.

Image Source: Dawn Endico under Creative Commons
Cal kicks off $250M football fundraising drive [SF Business Times]

The UCPD officers most involved with the 21-month charade were recognized for their perilous acts in the line of duty — and by recognized, we do mean hailed, cheered, and adored by some 6,000 sweaty bodies of testosterone and pigskin hype. The police officers took the field during a pause in Cal’s domination (more or less) over Arizona State, and the roar that filled the stadium was, admittedly, a bit sickening.

Don’t get us wrong, we were counting down the tree-sitters’ last days, too, but here’s a thought: Hippies are people, too. Smelly and odd as they may be. Behaving like animals and rubbing their noses in our victory may have been a bit much on our side.

But then again, this is college football, and we are the Bears. Grrrr …

Stay tuned for plans to raise sub-squillion dollars in future Cal Athletics fund raising.

Image Source: dboy under Creative Commons, edited by April Isabel Angeles
Earlier: Let the Joyous News Be Spread: Tree-Sitters Come Down

Fun fact: During a home football game, one of the safest places to be in Memorial Stadium while an earthquake shakes the game up is the student section, while one of the least safe is the alumni section. But all that might change if a team of San Francisco engineers is correct about their plastic plan to retrofit the stadium.

In short, the plan calls for Memorial Stadium to be partitioned into blocks that will rest on plastic sheets, hopefully preserving the structural integrity (for the most part) of the stadium after the quake—even if that means the people on the blocks might be seated a little differently, according to the project’s lead engineer.

What’s the price tag? Around $160 million, give or take a few million. But it’s worth it to protect what is “widely considered the most beautiful college football venue in the country,” yeah?

Image Source: Hitchster under Creative Commons
Retrofit plan to ride out quake at Cal stadium [Chron]

Another fitting headline may have been: Drones of News Choppers Nearly Drown out Tree Choppers and Sitters.

At any rate, the entire bay area is abuzz as tensions and violence flair at Oak Grove. You think we’re exaggerating? Scaffolding, helicopters and negotiators now surround the redwood that served as a tree home (tree home: like a tree house, but much more comfortable) to our Berkeley tree-sitters. On the ground, tree supporters have chained themselves to the tree and each other; arrests have been made.

The university may have called for an ultimatum, but the tree-sitters have their own ultimatum in mind as well. They’ve begun throwing buckets of “toilet waste” at arborists. Curse you, Mercury Times, for not specifying the contents of these buckets!

Image Source: Skyler Reid, Daily Cal
Most Trees Down Near UC Berkeley Stadium [Daily Cal]
End appears near for UC Berkeley tree-sitters [Mercury News]
Earlier: UCB Says Goodbye to 42 Trees and 21 Months of Litigation

It has been an emotional weekend for many at the foot of Oak Grove. Arborists have removed 35 of 42 trees as of Saturday, and are expected to cut down all but one redwood by today’s end.

Our redwood denizens no longer will receive adequate water and nutrition which the university has provided for 21 months. As of Friday, four tree-sitters remained with only one liter of water “to share”. We wonder if the heat will cause the tree-sitters to worry about their redwood’s thirst. UCB claims to have no plans of forcibly removing the tree-dwellers. We think the university is waiting for them to ripen and fall.

Updates on construction of the new project, which begins Monday, are to follow. In the meantime, check out the new signs that are making appearances alongside the usual hand-painted hemp banners:

Image Source: ingridtaylar under Creative Commons
UC Berkeley Grove cleared of most trees [SFGate]
Free Firewood at Oak Grove [YouTube]

The state appeals court that protestors were banking on to overturn Judge Miller’s earlier ruling also declined to block UC Berkeley’s nefarious designs upon our campus’s sacred oak grove earlier today, thereby incurring the wrath of the Panoramic Hill Association and the gratitude of almost everyone else. University officials, doing a jig of victory, say they’re planning to move forward immediately with construction. Not to be thwarted, tree advocates intend to leapfrog the pesky state appeals court by appealing directly to the big daddy-o of judicial authorities first thing tomorrow morning. Will the California Supreme Court drag out this sorry fracas, or is this really the end? Stay tuned. More dramatik developments are sure to follow.

Of course, there’s still the matter of the four tree-sitters idling up in those branches. Suggestions on how to go about disengaging them from their tree-top perch, short of prying them off with crowbars! Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Image Source: Kanaka’s Paradise Life under Creative Commons
Cal gets go-ahead for sports training center [SF Chron]
Construction Can Begin at UC Berkeley Stadium [Daily Cal]

Thus, we suggest you go to the commendably thorough California Golden Blogs for in-depth coverage of flinging excrement, grown adults acting like they’re in Never Never Land and high-res photos of Dumpster Muffin’s piss bottles.

In the mean time, we’ll give you a few “updates” on the saga that’s taking forever and ever to wrap–the Daily Cal reports that a stadium go-ahead is likely if they change their blueprints, although actual construction will definitely depend on whether the tree-sitters continue to build forts up there.

Also, the Berkeley City Council wants to keep feeding the treewoks, and are pissed at the university for not allowing outside groups to deliver food. The only way a tree-sitter can eat is if they descend, although we doubt they would do that. If you notice how currently out-of-touch with reality they are, imagine them under the delirium of starvation.

Image Source: Salim Virji under Creative Commons
California Golden Blogs [Website]
University Likely to Get Go-Ahead on Stadium [Daily Cal]
UC, Berkeley at odds over tree-sitters [SF Chronicle]

We think that means, “YAY! WE WON,” but it isn’t for sure. If the uber-long document looks good to campus officials, then it looks good to us. We’ll keep you updated as the press conferences come and go. In the mean time, we still have a few questions.

How will the university get those people out of the trees once and for all? We doubt they’ll come down willingly. And without tree-sitters, where will we go for our daily dose of inane Berkeley drama?

UPDATE 9:22 P.M. - Alright, so it looks like the drama will continue. Daily Cal reporters updated their article and report that the treewok side actually won in-part. Stadium development cannot take place unless the university complies with the Alquist-Priolo Earthquake Fault Zoning Act and the California Environmental Quality Act by drawing up a new plan. In other words, no trees will be cut down … for now.

This probably means that we’ll see a lot of Dumpster Muffin, Ayr and RunningWolf in the future, if and when the university manages to get a better plan together. For now, enjoy the end of this lawsuit–and Tightwad Hill–while you can!

Itching to see the 129-page ruling for yourself? Click here.

Image Source: Shamim Pakzad, Daily Cal
Judge Releases Stadium Ruling [Daily Cal]
Judge Barbara J. Miller’s Ruling on Stadium Lawsuits [Daily Cal]
Earlier: And God Said: ‘Let There Be a Ruling on Those Oaks in, Like, a Year or So’

Dean of Students Jonathan Poullard e-mailed the student body this evening to tell us to play nice with USC fans. The USC game has always been tense as of recent times, but we can control ourselves just fine, right? It’s easy to play by Poullard’s rules:

* Set a positive example both in and out of the stadium;
* Show respect for yourself, your team, and your university by demonstrating respect towards all around you;
* While you alone are responsible for your actions, you do have the opportunity to set a positive example for others

Right?

Monday, Nov. 5, 2007

1:45 p.m., Unit 2 bicycle racks: Found property, sent to UCPD bike bureau for safekeeping.

See? No one stole the bike! That’s nice. That shows respect for others.

Sunday, Nov. 4, 2007

12:30 a.m., Bowditch Street and Durant Ave: An officer talks to a male student, 21, for public intoxication and crossing against a red light. The officer also talks to a female student, 21, for crossing against a red light.

OK, so at least there wasn’t any harm done. A mere scratch on a glistening record.

Saturday, Nov. 3, 2007

7:33 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer ejects a male, 27, for an open alcohol container.

7:44 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officers talks to a male, 52, for smuggling alcohol.

8:24 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer talks to a male, 49, for causing a disturbance.

8:25 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer talks to a male, 14, for causing a disturbance.

8:28 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer talks to a male, 23, for throwing an object onto field and staff.

8:29 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer ejects a male, 19, for causing a disturbance and for public intoxication.

8:30 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer ejects a male, 20, for underage alcohol consumption.

9:05 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer ejects a female, 27, for public intoxication.

9:15 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer ejects a female, 24, for public intoxication.

9:20 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer ejects a male student, 19, for throwing objects into the crowd.

9:25 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer ejects a male student, 21, and another male, 25, for disorderly conduct.

9:30 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer ejects a female, 27, for causing a disturbance and for alcohol consumption.

10:08 p.m., Memorial Stadium: An officer ejects a male student, 20, for throwing an object into the crowd.

Oh. Damn.

Image Source: Nate Tabak
PoLo is compiled from the UC Police Department’s online Daily Activity Bulletin.
Earlier: PoLo: Spies, Suspicion and Sh—Human Waste