Our police log, the PoLo, is back with a vengeance to sing you a love song of campus crime. Maybe you thought your break was dicey, but if the log is any indication, the campus barely survived it.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

**12:38 a.m.**, _Sather Tower (The Campanile): Vandalism to light fixtures. Officers speak to 10 17- and 18-year-old non-students about it._

Little shits. Our fucking clock tower.

Monday, March 26, 2007

**10:47 a.m.**, _Near Grizzly Peak Gate: Male reports seeing medium-sized animal_. Under investigation.

Let’s hope they get the detectives on that one. Medium-sized animals near a regional park–now that’s a head scratcher.

**9:52 p.m.**, _Recreational Sports Facility garage: 36-year-old male cited on suspicion of possessing a knife with a blade greater than three inches long._

This man learned the hard way that you can have too many inches … of blade.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

**1:22 a.m.**, _Unit 3-Ida Sproul Hall: Male student, 19, reports simple assault. Suspect identified as a 22-year-old male non-student, and arrested at 2:04 a.m. at the intersection of Harold Way and Kittredge Street on suspicion of giving false information to a police officer and having an outstanding Berkeley police traffic warrant._

Damn, talk about drama in the units.

**12:18 p.m.**, _People’s Park: Officer speaks to woman about public masturbation._

Way to kill a lunchtime wank sess’.

**4:57 p.m.**, _Memorial Stadium: Rope confiscated as evidence of trespassing._

It’s unknown if this is related to the previous entry.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

**5:37 p.m.**, _South side of the Martin Luther King Jr. Union: Officer speaks to 39-year-old male about stealing electricity._

Clearly, stealing electricity from the ASUC is not a crime.

Earlier: PoLo: Weekend Roundup—Alcohol-Infused Tree Climbing, Motorcycle Outlaw Attacks and Heroin


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