Halloween is coming up on Wednesday, and we figure you’ve got the costume situation all sorted out already. You’ve also hit up the weekend’s parties, and now you have to brave a Castro-party-less night in your Chipotle burrito wrap. Being such generous people, we came up with some other ideas to perk up your holiday:

10. Trick-or-treat with the co-opers. We’re serious about this one–it’s actually happening.
9. Don’t watch old seasons of “The X-Files.” Search for real X-type things with fellow alien-obsessed astronomers on top of Campbell Hall.
8. Wait for the Great Pumpkin to show at the oak grove. Find Zachary RunningWolf instead. Offer to “trick-or-treat” for acorns with him.
7. Be a real zombie. Stay up all night and go CRRRAZAAAY.
6. Work on your paper. Everyone knows it’s all about the weekend shindigs anyway.
5. Visit a little shop of horror … for real.
4. Realize that it would probably be easier and cheaper to just buy a big bag of mixed candy yourself. Completely break free of your childhood’s sense of fun and adventure. Cry, and pour yourself a drink. Repeat.
3. Go to class in costume. Feel really, really stupid.
2. Go to the Castro anyway. 50 cent got shot nine times. So can you.
1. Give yourself a good fright by not only liking Britney Spears’ new album, but also buying it off iTunes.

Earlier: Top Ten: Your Metaphorical Security Blanket


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