#YOLO-ing: The cop way

In what may be the greatest execution of #yolo yet, UC Davis police officer Lt. John Pike will not be facing criminal charges. Not only will he go down in history as the cop who infamously blasted Occupy protestors in the face with pepper spray last November, but also as the guy who actually got away with it.

Hey, as the saying goes, “YOLO!”

In fact, to further add to the sheer beauty of YOLO-ing, the suit was filed with the Yolo County District Attorney’s office, which duly concluded, “[that] there is insufficient evidence to establish proof beyond a reasonable doubt that the use of force involved in the November 18, 2011, pepper spraying was unlawful and therefore warrants the filing of criminal charges.”

Because the American legal system is also a common law system (which takes previous cases as precedent for subsequent cases), this case may be the official opening of the floodgates for all things #yolo-related.

In the future, be on the lookout for these potential cop activities as more and more can now embrace the carpe diem lifestyle:

1. Tazing toddlers for poor behavior on the playground
2. Macing mommies for dry brownies at PTA meetings
3. Shaking down seniors for sitting too long on park benches
4. Beating dogs for pooping on lawns
5. Using riot gear on bratty teenagers
6. Arresting groups who walk too slowly on crowded sidewalks
7. Fining donut stores for not carrying their favorite jelly-filled
8. Tackling businessmen who use Bluetooth ear pieces
9. Ticketing joggers who don’t use crosswalks
10. Pepper-spraying students sitting down at protests

It’s true that the fuzz has never had a good reputation in society (fight the man, man!) but now that Yolo County has forgiven Lt. John Pike’s little YOLO incident, carrying your own pepper-spray may now be recommended for more than just fending off the homeless. #YOLO!


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