TrophyThis world we live in is a beautiful place, full of extraordinary wonders and secrets. You just have to appreciate how things just work. Like, for example … Did you know that your ability to make decisions is greatly affected when you’re under pressure to void your bladder? Or that male Australian jewel beetles find a certain type of beer bottle so unbearably desirable that they try to mate with them until, literally, “death do [them] part”? Or the best part: Harold Camping (you know, the umpteenth guy who most recently predicted the world’s demise and still hasn’t given up hope) was recognized for his failure in a spectacular, honorary way?

Wait, but there’s more: Most of the people involved in such studies are legitimate scientists.

Yes, Clog readers. There are scientists out there that intently watched and made acute, perhaps even revolutionary, observations on beetles passionately humpin’ and bumpin’ with read more »


It is not often when we wholeheartedly agree with Beetle. Today you witness something special.

Although deemed ineligible to run for an ASUC position, Jonathan Gaurano was granted “special status,” and now he’s senator-elect. How did this happen?

1. The Judicial Council said no to Gaurano because he was not a registered student this semester.
2. ASUC Auxiliary Director Nadesan Permaul helped him draft a letter requesting special status.
3. Elections Council Chair Emily Liedblad and ASUC Attorney General Michael Sinanian (remember him?

The Deep End of the Ocean divx

) said sure, why not?

But now it seems no one can remember what exactly was Gaurano’s argument in the first place. Beetle points out that there’s something wrong about this whole process involving “mysterious arguments nobody can remember.” We’d assume that if the argument was that convincing, that someone would remember.

Lieblad? Sinanian? Permaul? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

Image Source: Ssmallfry

Runaway Bride hd

The Rutles: All You Need Is Cash ipod under Creative Commons, edited by Christine Borden
ASUC Senator-Elect Granted Exception in Order to Run [Daily Cal Blood Sisters ipod

Oh….kay [Beetle Beat]

If you’re one of the cool people who changed CalMail settings to automatically forward stuff to your personal e-mail, you’ve probably already read the “Important Updates From Your Student Government” message. While it doesn’t qualify as a block of text, it definitely retains some properties—the Clog decided to spare you the trouble and time (You can’t be spending time reading e-mails what with all the procrastinating for that math quiz tomorrow) and break it down to the important pieces. read more »

asuc athonHence, the return of the hideous graphic font to the right. The Berkeley blogosphere is suddenly abuzz with the sound of ASUC elections campaigning, and the Clog’s almost ready to join the fun and get on the elections train for the rest of the semester. How will we ever keep up with this, Code Pink and Fresh all at once? We need more manpower. Hint, hint.

  • The first sign of elections season is the explosion of Student Action flyers. The California Patriot Blog has an interesting review about the relevance of Student Action’s “DONE” claims. Essentially, the flyers should probably read: DONE (Three Years Ago).
  • The executive slate announcements for each party are trickling in! Today’s Daily Cal announces the CalSERVE executive slate. An anti-CalSERVE blog, CalSUCK, was created surprisingly quickly, demonstrating how many of us bloggers are willing to abandon real life to cover the campaign.
  • read more »

    Yesterday fellow blogger Beetle announced that he will end his blog after this semester. Of course, that end will have to wait until ASUC drama of 2008 peters out, and we hope there will be something juicy enough to sustain Beetle until at least midsummer. Then again, isn’t there always something ASUC-flavored to sustain Beetle?

    Oh, right [Beetle Beat]

    The best (or in most cases, worst) of Berkeley’s blogosphere.

    * Bears Necessity: Avinash leaves us with a note so depressing we worry about his mental health. Buddy, there is help for you.* Nuts & Boalts: Al “Told You So” Gore for 2008! Ya really think so?* LJ Community: Berkeley students must be vigilant! Abstinence and sobriety could happen to you.

    * Beetle Beat: This actually made us laugh out loud. Fish are racist bastards, don’t cha know.

    * scot hacker’s foobar blog: Is the dancer turning counter-clockwise or clockwise? Are you left-brained or right? We don’t know, man–this is freaking us out!

    Earlier: Clog o’ Blogs: Trying to Get the Joke

    So the snide and relentlessly contrarian Christopher Hitchens (that British guy who promotes his “God is Not Great” book on a million talk shows) is tackling his latest issue with the aid of the Daily Cal. In his most recent editorial, Hitch linked the DC’s coverage of the slaying of a prominent Oakland journalist and focused on its connection to Your Black Muslim Bakery.

    It’s the third graph from the bottom for you obsessive clickers of online mag links. Kudos on the Slate worthy journalism, Daily Cal. Too bad Beetle doesn’t seem to like the coverage. Or maybe he does? You can never tell with Beetle these days …

    Oh, and we almost forgot to add that the Hitch piece is somewhat provocative. We wonder if the police will respond to his criticisms.

    Brutality by the Bay [Slate]
    Arrests Made in Slaying of Oakland Reporter [Daily Cal]

    Now that Sproul is once again free from pushy campaigners, it’s time for politics to really begin. While tabulation of last week’s votes takes place tonight, the Judicial Council prepares for some hell-filled weeks. It’s censure time! Woo! (Oh, if only it were as exciting as it sounds.)

    Actually, last year it was. The Judicial Council disqualified the Student Action slate in 2006, and in quite the hullabaloo, the slate was reinstated. This year, Student Action once again faces enough censures to potentially disqualify the executive slate.

    Perhaps Suken Vakil will make a guest appearance. Oh God, that would be sweet.

    Let’s take a look at all the censures, a list courtesy of Beetle.

    Remember, a total of five or more censures will disqualify a candidate from the election.

    The Judicial Council will hear cases against the following:

    * Student Life Fee Referendum – 1 censure for flier placement
    * DAAP Slate – 3 censures each for dorm campaigning, 1 censure each for flier placement
    * Chad Kunert – 1 censure for truncated disclaimer
    * Jessica Parra-Fitch and Gabriela Urena – 1 censure each for no disclaimer
    * Daniel Galeon, Danielle Duong, Maurice Seaty and Roxanne Winston – 1 censure each for truncated disclaimer
    * Shawn Jain – 3 censures for flier placement
    * Nadir Shams – up to 20 censures for claiming group endorsements, 1 censure for flier placement
    * Chris Wong – 1 censure for covered flier
    * Chris Wong and Lisa Patel – 1 censure each for truncated disclaimer
    * Student Action Executive Slate – 2 censures each for campaigning within 100 feet of a polling location
    * SA Executive Slate, Alex Mastrodonato, Winnie Kuo and Wayne Feng – 3 censures each for Material Science and Engineering Association endorsement
    * SA Executive Slate, Christian Osmena and Grace Shen – 1 censure each for flier placement (times two for two counts)
    * SA Executive Slate and Loretta Kwong – 1 censure each for a flier within 100 feet of a polling location
    * Dwight Asuncion, Wayne Feng and Winnie Kuo – 1 censure each for flier placement

    As the Daily Cal notes, this means up to eight censures against the SA slate, plus one extra for Asuncion because he’s extra special. Also,

    Seven of the suits were filed against candidates who allegedly posted campaign materials outside of permissible public spaces in university buildings, which is prohibited in the bylaws…

    Facebook postings were also a common feature in the charges against the candidates. Six suits were filed against candidates who allegedly claimed endorsements without bearing the disclaimer, “Titles for Identification Purposes Only,” which is required by the bylaws.

    According to the charges, some candidates violated the rule by only posting an abbreviated version of the disclaimer, while other candidates did not have a disclaimer at all.

    Judicial hearings start tomorrow night. Let the legal frenzy begin!

    Stay tuned for the tabulation–we’ll be updating shortly.

    Berkeley blogger Beetle (Justin Azadivar–ASUC candidate for everything) released his predictions for the ASUC elections along with his own personal endorsements. Do his endorsments even mean anything beyond the blogosphere? We don’t know, but we do know that he doesn’t even endorse himself.

    Beetle picks Van Nguyen of CalSERVE for President, Taylor Allbright of CalSERVE for EVP, Ben Narodick of SQUELCH! for EAVP (even though he’s not running for this position) and Ajay Krishnamurthy for Student Advocate. He has “no fucking clue” for the office of AAVP. Hmm…Justin Azadivar, anyone?

    The official Daily Cal endorsements don’t come out until Tuesday, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have a little fun with the senators now.

    The Clog presents: Special Awards for Special Senators. Brought to you by Facebook stalking.

    You may not win the election, senate candidates, but you’re all winners in our hearts.

    Dude, You Need to Stop with the Videos Already
    Nadir Shams, #56 – Indepedent. He lists NINE links under “Website.” And yes, we’ve all seen the “Numa” video.

    We’re Not Even Sure You Exist Cuz We Couldn’t Find You on Facebook
    Dimitri Garcia, #74 – DAAP. Angela Aguilar, #77 – DAAP. Falola Takapu, #78 – DAAP. Maryjane Castillo, #81 – DAAP. Ana Luz Acevedo-Cabrera, #83 – Student Action. Beverly Elithorp, #88 – Student Action. Ross Ligenfelder, #96 – Berkeley Squirrel Party. Kevin Heikin, #111 – SQUELCH!. Sarah Brennon, #114 – SQUELCH!. Daniel Galeon, #130 – CalSERVE.

    We don’t understand.

    You’re Taking Too Many Classes. Stop Showing off Already.
    Maribeth Moore, #70 – UNITE Greek. SIX classes? Are you serious? And are those graduate classes we see? We’re not worthy! We’re not worthy!

    Your Facebook Picture Makes Us Want to Take a Bite out of You
    Gabe Weiner, #98 – SQUELCH!.

    We’re just in the mood for weiners. Not Wang, not Narodick–just a nice juicy Weiner.

    Gets Hyphy for Jesus
    Edward Chow, #133 – CalSERVE. His Facebook status reads: “Edward is singing, ‘Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah!’ cuz his homeboy is Risen from the dead.” We bet he had one helluva good Friday.

    Best Only Music Video
    Alex Mastrodonato, #137 – APPLE Engineering.

    We didn’t like the original song to begin with, so we think your version is better by default. Even if you don’t win, we’re absolutely sure you’ll get a record deal. Have you, by any chance, heard of William Hung?

    The BIEs! [Beetle Beat]

    We introduced you to the ASUC presidential hopefuls of 2007. There were thousands of Facebook friends, that hot gay guy and then the other dude who’s “not a douchebag.” This is ASUC at its finest, folks.

    We hope you’re ready for the rest of the executive slate. These people are going to bombard you with flyers and chalk your neighborhoods. You might as well know their names (and then stalk them on Facebook). Perhaps you’ll even add Ilana Nankin as your friend.

    Let’s start with the powerhouse party Student Action. You’ll be seeing these candidates’ heads on huge posters everywhere post-Spring Break. Oh God, we can’t wait.
    * Presidential Candidate: Ilana Nankin, current Student Action senator
    * Executive Vice Presidential Candidate: Eunice Moon, current Student Action senator
    * Academic Affairs Vice Presidential Candidate: Curtis Lee, current Student Action senator
    * External Affairs Vice Presidential Candidate: Dwight Asuncion, current APPLE Engineering senator

    Then there’s CalSERVE, which announced its executive slate way in advance. DONE. Wait–sorry, wrong party slogan.
    * Presidential Candidate: Van Nguyen, current CalSERVE senator
    * Executive Vice Presidential Candidate: Taylor Allbright, current CalSERVE senator
    * Academic Affairs Vice Presidential Candidate: Caro Jauregui, current CalSERVE senator
    * External Affairs Vice Presidential Candidate: Danny Montes, CalSERVE issues coordinator

    SQUELCH! comes next, and its slate features a Daily Cal columnist. We swear we’re completely unbiased. But if he, too, took his clothes off for a photoshoot…then we might bend the rules.
    * Presidential Candidate: Joe Rothberg, SQUELCH! party member
    * Executive Vice Presidential Candidate: David Wasserman, current SQUELCH! senator
    * Academic Affairs Vice Presidential Candidate: John O’Connor, SQUELCH! party co-signatory
    * External Affairs Vice Presidential Candidate: John Waste, SQUELCH! party member

    Finally, we’ve got fellow blogger Beetle in a category all of his own. He’s going to put the “slay” in executive slate. Just you wait and see.
    * Presidential Candidate: Justin Azadivar
    * Executive Vice Presidential Candidate: Justin Azadivar
    * Academic Affairs Vice Presidential Candidate: Justin Azadivar
    * External Affairs Vice Presidential Candidate: Justin Azadivar

    Welcome to the jungle of student politics. The Clog’s got your fun and games.

    Parties Put Forth Slates for Upcoming ASUC Elections [Daily Cal]