As the semester nears its closure, it is becoming more apparent that students willClick picture for more info! do just about anything to get ahead of their peers. Finals are but a few hours away for some of us, and we can barely trust our friends that were once study buddies for fear they might screw up the curve. Fear not, because there’s a new way to make sure you’re in prime position to tear through your finals without succumbing to the Adderall and Red Bull craze that pervades this time of year. For the mere price of an Andrew Jackson, you can lounge in that stiff wooden chair that is guaranteed to be more comfortable than your dorm chair, your bed, and the roof of Pimentel Hall.

It seems that UC Berkeley students have innovatively come up with ways to make financial progress through these tough times along with their academic advancements. This unnamed entrepreneur is offering you the once-in-a-lifetime chance to snag a seat in one of the best locations on all of campus. The Gardner Main Stacks are a perfect spot to study, though they have allowed the air of intellectual stimulation to get contaminated by the leftover stench of the naked run, or the general possibility of the existence of Stanford students in the library.

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Finding a place to study on this vast campus for a newly arrived freshman (or even for some that have already spent some time here) can be a daunting task. There are so many options, and today we’d like to give you some insight into just some of the places that you can sleep study all night long.

1. Main Stacks – Daniel Radding

Main Stacks is that way.
Main Stacks is that way.

In hindsight, we probably should not have sent one of our cub writers to Main Stacks, because it is really easy to get lost down there if you don’t know what you’re doing. Main Stacks is a HUGE library. To give you a sense of its size, consider this: You can enter from Doe and exit from Moffitt. There are four floors total (though you can only study on the lower three) with 400 seats available for individual study. Main Stacks offers a large variety of study environments, which we’re going to break down for you.

This has recently been dubbed the Hallway of Doom.

This has recently been dubbed the Hallway of Doom.

Standing Desks

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3030939_a9883342b7This past weekend, while many of you suckers beloved readers were calling Main Stacks home and knee-deep in midterm studying (can someone please explain to us why professors call ‘em “midterms” when we’re only five weeks into the semester?), the Clog took an excursion down south to enjoy the beautiful, polluted auburn skies/beach water of Los Angeles, California.

And, in realizing that our then No. 1 Cal women’s volleyball team would be battling Pac-12 adversaries USC and UCLA on consecutive nights, we figured we’d take advantage of the opportunity to celebrate a couple of victories in enemy territory.

Of course, the gods recognized our arrogant thought process and threw a wrench in our plans.

In 13 games, the Bears had only lost read more »

We were ready for one of those nights. A Main Stacks night. There were more books in our bag than hours left in the day. There was a caffeinated drink tucked away neatly, waiting to be smuggled in. Yes, we were prepared to disappear into the library until the final “may I have your attention please” blared from the intercom. Sadly, it was not to be.

Our grand plans for the evening evaporating as we clutched the handles of Moffitt’s locked doors in desperation, we at least had the presence of mind to check the calendar so thoughtfully affixed before us. It was exactly as we feared: the library closed at 5 p.m. today, and will closed all day tomorrow. Ugh. How are we supposed to really enjoy our day off without holing ourselves up in a sterile and intellectually draining subterranean study hell for as many hours as sanity permits? read more »

Now that it’s midterm season, you may be just discovering that the campus libraries have made a few changes. Moffitt and the Main Stacks are now the only libraries open on Saturday (but at least they open at 9 a.m. instead of 2 p.m.) and finals 24-hour study hall is now a thing of the past. That’s right, no more Anoncon marathons or Main Stacks hookup fantasies.

Maybe students are still caught up in the spirit of protest due to the recent walkout or just really downright incensed that they can’t go to the Anthropology Library on Saturdays anymore (it is our favorite library on campus), but for whatever reason, the Anthropology Library has become the location for a 24-hour “study in.”

The tagline for the event is “last time we walked out … this time we’ll study in.” read more »

In case you were actually studying or something during finals, and you were not lined up along the pathway on Level C of Main Stacks (psh, you intellectual elitist) then you missed over 3 dozen co-opers freeing themselves of their intellectual and material burdens as they streaked through the stacks this past Monday.

The annual naked run through the library makes UCLA’s Undie Run look about as radical as wearing neon colors and making obscure references to ninjas. So next year, instead of going on Facebook for the 100th time or watching reruns of The Simpsons to liberate your mind from finals, why not liberate your body from its material bonds–or just be a creeper and watch the parade of nudity, like us. We’re not judging, either way.

Cal Streakers Finals Week-Fall 2008 [YouTube]

We actually think that midterms suck in general, but when they’re in the beginning of June, when our brains were just finally getting nice and mushy after finals, well, that just feels like an especially poignant kick to the crotch. It’s painful. It’s rude. It can result in infertility (okay, not that last one).Somewhere between the horrors of moving and (hopefully) going out and doing some of those “summery” things that normal people (who don’t work for the Clog) get to do, you find yourself needing to read 220 pages of Freud and Adler and Rogers and everything else having to do with the theoretical basis for personality . . . but it’s so damn nice outside.

Possibly to keep the Session A folks from feeling too left out from the normal joys of sunshine and happiness, the Summer Sessions staff sent out an e-mail today reminding everyone that “the beginning of Session B (June 11 – August 17) (is) fast approaching.” Now the Session A people have someone else to commiserate with over the Main Stacks closing after 6 p.m.

Obviously, there are some nice things about Summer Sessions, like not needing to overload yourself with 20 units of astrophysics all through the rest of the year or being able to go study somewhere incredibly bad ass. For those of us who aren’t insane rocket-scientist-type majors and are staying in this summer-time ghost town, the main advantage is that it gives us something to do other than working low-stress jobs, playing Mario Kart, lounging in the sun, not getting up until two in the afternoon . . . wait a second, why in the name of fuck are we doing this?

Somehow, someway, we got our hands on more Stacks-streaking footage. But that’s the kind of hard-hitting journalism you expect from us, right? This clip is worth viewing just for the naked leaper at the 15-second mark. Not since the first Olympics has an unclothed dude gotten air like that. Michael Jordan’s imaginary exhibitionist alter ego would be so damn proud.

FYI, These videos are NSFW. That means there are naked people. As if the headline didn’t clue you in.Last night, students streaked through the library. It happens every semester during finals time, but flapping johnsons never cease to amaze the library denizens.

As the streakers ran past, we caught a whiff of B.O., but that might have been the library in general, seeing as some people don’t even bother to shower during finals.

Nonetheless, Berkeley has some pretty nice butts. (Even if they haven’t been washed.)

Next semester, we suggest that AnonCon participants streak together instead of picnic or meet up over coffee. Hey, if you’re going to bare your soul on the Internet, you might as well bare your butt too.

You can find a shorter clip under the Clog’s YouTube account.