Allo, allo fellow Bears! How is summer treating you? Tanning lots? No? Staying inside all day just staring at the computer screen? We knew it! Go outside and get some fresh air.

But if you insist on staying inside, here are some tips on getting that ol’ laptop a little more speedy when you turn it on. read more »

windows funny logoFinally managed to tame your Windows PC? Microsoft says, “Good! Here comes Windows 8.”

We knew it was coming, but why so soon? People always complain when a company updates a product line (we’re looking at you, Apple). However, consumers justify the corporate evils as long as the product in question proves itself to be a significant upgrade. Microsoft promises this by showing off a Windows 8 PC with amazing boot up times and a tablet-like interface that allows one to customize his or her own Metro Apps (think App Store except it’s Windows).

Fast computers and pretty eye candy are important to students, but reliability and stability are more important. The Clog surveyed a handful of Berkeley students and obtained … interesting results. read more »

Microsoft and Google duked it out for some Facebook ownership, and it looks like Bill Gates wins this round. Microsoft penned a deal to buy 1.6 percent of Facebook for $240 million, which (at that rate) would price the entire site at $15 billion. Google wanted a piece of the action, too, but it’ll have to be content with its $900 million deal with MySpace.

Facebook is growing, and it’s the site to watch … or at least Microsoft hopes. Right now, Facebook sees about 50 million active users while MySpace rakes in about 110 million. Microsoft thinks Facebook could quadruple its numbers and possibly surpass its rival.

So now we get it. Opening up the site to everyone and their mothers was a ploy to get more money. Ah, Zuckerberg, whatever happened to your elitism?

The Chronicle’s front page was bursting with the news, and we’re sure the big guns at Microsoft were jerking off to their glory:

For Microsoft, the deal with Facebook was a must-have, cementing its ad business and signaling that it’s serious about Web 2.0 ventures, said Allen Weiner, an analyst with Gartner.

“This is Microsoft saying, ‘We are going to be a key player in Web 2.0 and the intersection of the Web and media,’ ” Weiner said.

Does anyone else despise this term, “Web 2.0,” or are we just too hip for the game? It’s the World Wide Web–second release. Better graphics! More hidden levels! Oh, and don’t forget those widget thingies–let’s get more of those, whatever they do.

Maybe we’re just pissy because Microsoft products are so expensive and we’re still stuck with Word 2000 and the Word 2007 program in the computer lab is so damn confusing no matter how many times we use it. We propose that Microsoft make up for this travesty by offering free programs through Facebook. And can Adobe get involved in this too? We’d really like to get Photoshop on our computer. We could have made a mindblowing graphic of Zuckerberg and Gates making out or something.

So we’re a little upset Google didn’t hook up with Facebook. Why? Because Gmail is the greatest thing ever and Google Calendar controls our lives. Plus, “google” is officially a verb. “MSN search” is not. Enough said.

Microsoft buys stake in Facebook [SF Gate]