Academically Elitist KangarooMaybe you should try your luck at professorial life down undah! According to a study from Melbourne University, by the time you graduate and go to grad school, about a quarter of Australia’s “senior academics” will retire … leaving spots open for you!

So quit yer whining about how you’re going to toil for untold years getting advanced degrees only to enter into an academic job market that is barren for a young upstart like yourself.

You can always travel the path less trodden, to the largest island in the world. Where the toilets all flush backwards, kangaroos stop to say “G’Day!” and where the economy is flourishing! Roight, guys?! Roight! Incidentally, did you know that Aussies and Brits call scientists “boffins?” Well, thanks to the above linked article by Australia’s ABC News (and the Clog), now you do.

Image Source: alumroot under Creative Commons
Australia facing academic exodus: study [ABC News], via The Ticker


pimpRemember when Beetle said he was done blogging Berkeley last year? Remember when he “temporarily reopened Death Wish II move

because you suck”? Well, he just announced that he’s retiring for good this time and that yesterday’s post

Cat People trailer Sleepwalkers will be his last. In it, he comes down pretty hard on … well, humanity in general, according to the comments–though we have a sneaking suspicion that much of the post was actually directed at a certain student government we all know and love (er, love to hate, but who’s counting?).

Accordingly, he ended on a bit of a sour note:

“All in all, I’ve been very disappointed in you people. Your cowardice, your obsessions, your bigotry, your arrogance… what the hell is wrong with you?”

We suppose we can’t exactly blame him, given all of this year’s ASUC hooplah, and–to be completely honest–we’re not totally sure we believe that this’ll be the last we hear from Beetle, anyhow. We mean, Beetle Beat’s tagline at the moment is “Nap Time!!!” for God’s sake. Who doesn’t expect to wake up from a nap? No one, that’s who.

In any case, for what it’s worth, the Clog is bustin’ out the pimp cup again in your honor, Beetle. It’s been real, and you’ll be missed–if you’re really gone, that is …

Retiring for realz this time [Beetle Beat]
Earlier: Beetle Has Left the Building

Cal announced last Thursday that long-time men’s swimming coach Nort Thornton had officially retired.

But according to reports by Swimming World Magazine, it looks like Thornton—who coached the Bears for 33 years—was let go by the university.

Swimming World Magazine received this email from Thornton shortly before the university announced his retirement.

I just came away from a meeting with Sandy Barbour, our Athletic Director, and she has released me from the position of Head Swimming Coach here at Cal. She intends to go on a full search for a new coach for this Fall. So that is it, pure and simple.

I want to thank all of you for your part in Cal Swimming and I will miss every one of you. Nort

Swimming World Magazine also interviewed Thornton, and he further explained the circumstances regarding his leaving Cal. Apparently, Thornton “retired” last year to open up some money to offer co-head coach Mike Bottom to stay with the Bears. However, Bottom left Cal to coach an independent swimming club.

When Mike resigned to take over The Race Club, I think that the athletics department took this as an opportunity to make a change. They said that they did not want me on deck or to go to Nationals so that they could begin with a job search.”

This sounds kind of shady. This also makes us wonder how many of the recent resignations and retirements of Cal head coaches were actually initiated by that head coach. Or were these coaches leaving the university, forced by someone at the athletic department?

We really don’t know. All we can do is speculate.

Whatever the case is, it sounds pretty iffy to us. First, all the coaches that have left— Chris Huffins, Jan Brogan, Kevin Boyd and now Thornton—have all been relatively successful.

If the university is forcing these coaches out, why? Why change something that has been working the last few years?

Nort Thornton Retires as Cal Head Coach []
Nort Thornton Gone From the University of California as Head Men’s Coach [Swimming World Magazine]
Nort Thornton Goes Deeper Into His Dismissal from the University of California [Swimming World Magazine]
Mike Bottom to Leave University of California to Take Helm of The Race Club [Swimming World Magazine]